There is a level of awe one goes through when peering upon your massive form anchored poolside. A great glistening blob of Caucasia. The gleam pierces the eye, but not enough to distract one from the grotesque nature of it all. And to see the poor soul you have at your spilling over sides applying sunscreen without the help of a paint roller, really just adds unneeded pathos to the situation. Thankfully, I am too far away to hear sounds from which surely I would never recover. Like a manatee being forced through a carwash.
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