What was that? You were saying?

It is a thrilling, ironic reversal of roles to hear you talk down to me. So wildly out of place and unwarranted that I almost wonder if I am still sleeping. Is this a dream that someone so deficient, so utterly incompetent would even attempt to challenge anything about me? Maybe this is a parallel universe where up is down and black is white and you have anything of interesting or substantial to say. You will do well to keep your head down and mouth clasped closed hoping that no one notices you. As it was, it should be again. For your sake. But for now, sit calmly in quiet shock as I eviscerate you in front of all these people.